Self-Development Book Club

Book Discussion Post!!
High Performance Habits starts out describing high performers and the dreaded plateau, loss of passion, or burn out. With a world moving so fast it can feel overwhelming to stay ahead. The old adage of grit and hard work are no longer the only factors that keep us moving forward. There is something more. Throughout the introduction the 6 High Performance Habits are alluded to. The key to sustained high performance.
"PEOPLE ARE HOPEFUL AND READY TO MAKE A CHANGE, BUT LACKING DIRECTION AND THE RIGHT HABITS THEY RISK LIVING UNEXCITING, DISCONNECTED, UNFULFILLED LIVES."

The differences between people who have occasional success and high performers are the habits put in place. We learn that not all habits are created equal. Achievement is not your problem - alignment is. Certainty is the enemy of growth and high performance. Technology won't save us.
What is high performance? This book refers to high performance as succeeding beyond standard norms, consistently over the long term.
Here is what we learn in this book about high performers. High performers are more successful than their peers, yet they are less stressed. High performers love challenges and are more confident that they will achieve their goals despite adversity. High performers are healthier than their peers. High performers are happy. High performers are admired. High performers get better grades and reach higher positions of success. High performers work passionately regardless of traditional rewards. High performers are assertive (for the right reasons). High performers see and serve beyond their strengths. High performers are uniquely productive - they've mastered prolific quality output. High performers are adaptive servant leaders.
This book offers a free online assessment to gage where you currently stand in regards to high performance. At the end it encourages you to retake the assessment and see if your score changes.
This assessment can be found at HighPerformanceIndicator.com
This section of the book concludes with identifying what are the most effective practices: clarity, energy, necessity, productivity, influence, and courage. These are known as the High Performance 6 (HP6). All of which will be broken down throughout the book.
"EFFECTIVENESS IN LIFE DOES NOT COME FROM FOCUSING ON WHAT IS AUTOMATIC, EASY, OR NATURAL FOR US. RATHER, IT IS THE RESULT OF HOW WE CONSCIOUSLY STRIVE TO MEET LIFE'S HARDER CHALLENGES, GROW BEYOND OUR COMFORTS, AND DELIBERATELY WORK TO OVERCOME OUR BIASES AND PREFERENCES, SO THAT WE MAY UNDERSTAND, LOVE, SERVE, AND LEAD OTHERS."

What were your takeaways from these two sections?

September Book of the Month!

If there is a book you would like us to read as a group, feel free to suggest it. We are continuously looking for books to help us all move the needle in our lives. Some might not be perfect but, hopefully, you can find some nuggets of wisdom in each book we read.

About this month’s pick:

THESE HABITS WILL MAKE YOU EXTRAORDINARY.

Twenty years ago, author Brendon Burchard became obsessed with answering three questions:

1. Why do some individuals and teams succeed more quickly than others and sustain that success over the long term?
2. Of those who pull it off, why are some miserable and others consistently happy on their journey?
3. What motivates people to reach for higher levels of success in the first place, and what practices help them improve the most

After extensive original research and a decade as the world’s leading high performance coach, Burchard found the answers. It turns out that just six deliberate habits give you the edge. Anyone can practice these habits and, when they do, extraordinary things happen in their lives, relationships, and careers.

Which habits can help you achieve long-term success and vibrant well-being no matter your age, career, strengths, or personality? To become a high performer, you must seek clarity, generate energy, raise necessity, increase productivity, develop influence, and demonstrate courage. The art and science of how to do all this is what this book is about.

Whether you want to get more done, lead others better, develop skill faster, or dramatically increase your sense of joy and confidence, the habits in this book will help you achieve it faster. Each of the six habits is illustrated by powerful vignettes, cutting-edge science, thought-provoking exercises, and real-world daily practices you can implement right now.

If you’ve ever wanted a science-backed, heart-centered plan to living a better quality of life, it’s in your hands. Best of all, you can measure your progress. A link to a free professional assessment is included in the book.

Book Discussion Post

Feel free to post your takeaways and let us know what you thought of the book!

For our final book discussion post on “Dare to Lead” we will cover the conclusion of this transformational take on leadership.

“Daring leaders who live into their values and never silent about hard things”

A value is a way of being or believing that we hold most important. Living into our values means that we do more than profess our values, we practice them. We walk our talk—we are clear about what we believe and hold important, and we take care that our intentions, words, thoughts, and behaviors align with those beliefs.

Here are the steps to live into your values:
1. We can’t live into values that we can’t name
2. Taking values from BS to behavior
3. Empathy and self-compassion: The two most important seats in the area.
4. Getting good at receiving feedback
5. Know my values = know me. No values = no me.

In part three: Braving trust, we learn that no trust means no connection.

Boundaries: You respect my boundaries, and when you’re not clear about what’s okay and not okay, you ask. You’re willing to say no.

Reliability: You do what you say you’ll do. At work, this means staying aware of your competencies and limitations so you don’t overpromise and are able to deliver on commitments and balance competing priorities.

The BRAVING Inventory

Accountability: You own your mistakes, apologize, and make amends.

Vault: You don’t share information or experiences that are not yours to share. I need to know that my confidences are kept, and that you’re not sharing with me any information about other people that should be confidential.

Integrity: You choose courage over comfort. You choose what is right over what is fun, fast, or easy. And you choose to practice your values rather than simply professing them.

Non-judgment: I can ask for what I need, and you can ask for what you need. We can talk about how we feel without judgment. We can ask each other for help without judgment.

Generosity: You extend the most generous interpretation possible to the intentions, words, and actions of others. Part four: Learning to rise

“When we have the courage to walk into our story and own it, we get to write the ending. And when we don’t own our stories of failue, setbacks and hurt- they own us”

The reckoning is as simple as that: knowing that we’re emotionally hooked and then getting curious about it.

The first story we make up is what we call the “sh*tty first draft,” or the SFD. In our SFDs, fear fills in the data gaps. What makes that scary is that stories based on limited real data and plentiful imagined data, blended into a coherent, emotionally satisfying version of reality, are called conspiracy theories.

THE DELTA
The difference—the delta—between what we make up about our experiences and the truth we discover through the process of rumbling is where the meaning and wisdom of this experience live. The delta holds our key learnings—we just have to be willing to walk into our stories and rumble.

As you think about your own path to daring leadership, remember Joseph Campbell’s wisdom: “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” Own the fear, find the cave, and write a new ending for yourself, for the people you’re meant to serve and support, and for your culture. Choose courage over comfort. Choose whole hearts over armor. And choose the great adventure of being brave and afraid. At the exact same time.

Coffee Hour, live in the Facebook group is this Tuesday at 6:30 PM EDT!

We have a very special guest, Elliott Eddie.

Elliott is the inventor of the world’s 1st and only STEM Accredited entrepreneur board game titled, The Entrepreneur Game by EESpeaks. To date this game has been purchased in nine different countries around the world and has expanded to include four versions in multiple languages all manufactured in the U.S.A. Most recently, The Entrepreneur Game has released its Virtual Entrepreneurship and Educational Program, which is currently being played online and by App in four Countries around the world. The Entrepreneur Game has been featured in Newsweek Magazine, Forbes Magazine, Yahoo Finance!, BlackNews.com and The G.E.D Corner with DL Hughley.

Elliott has been active with the Richmond Public Library, the Richmond Public School system, and various communities around and outside of Virginia, providing Entrepreneur Workshops to children and adults.

“What excites me are the possibilities”.

Discussion Post Friday

So many deep takeaways this week! What were some of yours?

Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind. Courage and faith are our core values, and when we are in fear we show up in ways that leave us feeling out of alignment with these values and outside our integrity.

Leaders must either invest a reasonable amount of time attending to fears and feelings, or squander an unreasonable amount of time trying to manage ineffective and unproductive behavior.

Section 3: The ARMORY

Shame is the feeling that washes over us and makes us feel so flawed that we question whether we’re worthy of love, belonging, and connection.

Perfectionism actually sets us up to feel shame, judgment, and blame, which then leads to even more shame and self-blame: It’s my fault. I’m feeling this way because I’m not good enough.

When we’re feeling that edge, instead of asking ourselves “What’s the quickest way to make these feelings go away?,” ask, “What are these feelings and where did they come from?”

What makes embracing vulnerability feel the most terrifying is how taking off the armor and exposing our hearts can open us up to experiencing shame. Our egos are willing to keep our hearts encased in armor, no matter the cost, if we can avoid feeling “less than” or unworthy of love and belonging.

Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love, belonging, and connection.

When it comes to real talk about shame, we have to set it up the right way so people feel safe. These are powerful conversations.

Shame resilience is the ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it. Ultimately, shame resilience is about moving from shame to empathy—the real antidote to shame.

There is a positive correlation between inclusivity, innovation, and performance. It’s only when diverse perspectives are included, respected, and valued that we can start to get a full picture of the world, who we serve, what they need, and how to successfully meet people where they are.

To review, empathy is first: I take the perspective of another person, meaning I become the listener and the student, not the knower. Second: I stay out of judgment. And third and fourth: I try to understand what emotion they’re articulating and communicate my understanding of that emotion.

HOW TO PRACTICE SELF-COMPASSION Talk to yourself the way you’d talk to someone you love. Most of us shame, belittle, and criticize ourselves in ways we’d never think of doing to others.

Grounded Confidence = Rumble Skills + Curiosity + Practice

What Rumble Skills will you be incorporating into your life?

Friday Discussion Post

Part One: Rumbling with Vulnerability
Courage is contagious

The Moment and the myths. The moment the universe put the Roosevelt quote in front of Brené , three lessons came into sharp focus. The first one is what she calls “the physics of vulnerability.” It’s pretty simple: If we are brave enough often enough, we will fall. Daring is not saying “I’m willing to risk failure.” Daring is saying “I know I will eventually fail, and I’m still all in.”

Vulnerability is not winning or losing. It’s having the courage to show up when you can’t control the outcome. If you are not in the arena getting your ass kicked on occasion, I’m not interested in or open to your feedback. There are a million cheap seats in the world today filled with people who will never be brave with their lives but who will spend every ounce of energy they have hurling advice and judgment at those who dare greatly.

I’m getting clear on whose opinions matter to me. Thank you for being one of those people. I’m grateful that you care enough to be honest and real with me.

Myth #1: Vulnerability is weakness

Myth #2: I don’t do vulnerability

Myth #3: I can go it alone

Myth #4: You can engineer the uncertainty and discomfort out of vulnerability

Myth #5: Trust comes before vulnerability

Myth #6: Vulnerability is disclosure.

To feel is to be vulnerable. Believing that vulnerability is weakness is believing that feeling is weakness.

Has your concept of what vulnerability is changed since starting this book?

Today starts our first weekly discussion for Dare To Lead! Join in commenting on your takeaways. This week we read to page 70. If you haven’t started the book yet, there is still time. If you have already finished the book, jump into our discussion and share!

The courage to be vulnerable is not about winning or losing, it’s about the courage to show up when you can’t predict or control the outcome.

As Marcus Aurelius taught us, “What stands in the way becomes the way.” Here are the ten behaviors and cultural issues that leaders identified as getting in our way in organizations across the world:

1. We avoid tough conversations, including giving honest, productive feedback.
2. Rather than spending a reasonable amount of time proactively acknowledging and addressing the fears and feelings that show up during change and upheaval, we spend an unreasonable amount of time managing problematic behaviors.
3. Diminishing trust caused by a lack of connection and empathy.
4. Not enough people are taking smart risks or creating and sharing bold ideas to meet changing demands and the insatiable need for innovation.
5. We get stuck and defined by setbacks, disappointments, and failures, so instead of spending resources on clean-up to ensure that consumers, stakeholders, or internal processes are made whole, we are spending too much time and energy reassuring team members who are questioning their contribution and value.
6. Too much shame and blame, not enough accountability and learning.
7. People are opting out of vital conversations about diversity and inclusivity because they fear looking wrong, saying something wrong, or being wrong.
8. When something goes wrong, individuals and teams are rushing into ineffective or unsustainable solutions rather than staying with problem identification and solving.
9. Organizational values are gauzy and assessed in terms of aspirations rather than actual behaviors that can be taught, measured, and evaluated.
10.Perfectionism and fear are keeping people from learning and growing.

You can’t get to courage without rumbling with vulnerability. Embrace the suck. Self-awareness and self-love matter. Who we are is how we lead. Courage is contagious. To scale daring leadership and build courage in teams and organizations, we have to cultivate a culture in which brave work, tough conversations, and whole hearts are the expectation, and armor is not necessary or rewarded. Daring leaders must care for and be connected to the people they lead.

Think about this list of behaviors, which 3 present the most significant barrier to courageous leadership in your work or life?

Friday Book Discussion

This is the final week of our July book - Atomic Habits! What did you think? What habit were you able to implement? What was the hardest part? Share below!

Chapter 15: The Fundamental Rule of Behavior Change

The possibility of us repeating a behavior is high when the experience is satisfying. The problem with your priorities is that human behavior went through the process of evolution to prefer quick rewards over delayed rewards. The fundamental rule of behavior change is: We repeat what is immediately rewarded. We avoid what is immediately punished. If we want a habit to stay, we need to feel successful even if it is in a tiny manner. The initial three laws of behavior change (i.e., make it obvious, attractive, and easy) boost the chances of a behavior being carried out. The 4th Law, make it satisfying, boosts the chances of a behavior being reiterated next time. To make a habit last, try to feel successful right after it.

Chapter 16: Continuing Good Habits Daily

Making progress can lead to a lot of satisfaction. Visual measures, which might include shifting paper clips, hairpins, or marbles from one jar/container to another when you are done with a small task (one item per task) can be extremely satisfying since it offers obvious evidence of one's progress. The best way to measure a habit is right after it has been carried out. The formula for habit stacking + habit tracking: After [CURRENT HABIT], I will [TRACK MY HABIT]. Examples: After I make a sales call, I will shift one paper clip from one container to another. Try to avoid breaking a habit. Keep it going. Don't miss twice in a row. If you miss once, try to go back as early as possible.

Chapter 17: The Importance of Having an Accountability Partner

The probability of repeating a bad habit is less if it is unsatisfying or painful. An accountability partner can help us experience a quick cost of a lack of action. Others' opinions of us are extremely significant. We do not want them to have an unfavorable opinion of us. We can activate a social cost to a behavior by using a habit contract.

Chapter 18: Talent and the Extent of Genes’ Roles

We need to select the correct field of competition to increase our chances for success. Everything is not for everyone. Going forward is easy if you choose the correct habit. Everything will become a challenge if you choose the wrong habit. We cannot change genes. They offer a strong advantage in positive conditions and a severe disadvantage in negative conditions. When our habits synchronize with our natural abilities, they are easier. Select the habits that truly suit you. Play to your strengths. Choose a game that capitalizes on your strengths. If you cannot identify a game that gives you an advantage, devise one. Genes do not take away the requirement for hard work. They unveil it by telling us what we should work hard on.

Chapter 19: The Goldilocks Rule: How to Keep the Motivation Alive in Life and Work

The Goldilocks rule underlines that humans go through the highest degree of motivation while dealing with tasks that are at the brim of their present abilities. We need to note that the biggest challenge to success is boredom rather than failure. When habits become part of our schedule, we lose interest in them and do not derive satisfaction from them. We experience boredom. All of us can work hard amidst motivation. What really matters is the resolve to continue when work does not excite us anymore. Professionals adhere to their routine. Amateurs get distracted by life.

Chapter 20: Negative Aspect of Forming Good Habits

Mastery = Habits + Intentional Practice The advantage of habits is that we can get things done without even thinking. The disadvantage is that we might start ignoring small mistakes. We can stay aware of our performance over time by using reflection and review. When we adhere closely to an identity, it becomes increasingly difficult to surpass it.

Congratulations! You completed Atomic Habits! You made reading a habit by finishing this book.

An atomic habit can change our life. When we start small, we can build the foundation of truly remarkable change. We can grow from one atomic habit by letting them multiply. It can give rise to a chain which keeps growing longer and improving our lives. Truly great change will start at some point. If we want to change our life, we should start today. Nothing is impossible for us if we learn and try to discipline ourselves. No one can accomplish anything by dreaming only. We have to support our dreams by making proper plans and focusing on the tiny details. The strategies in this book teach us how to do that effectively.

August Book of the Month - Dare to Lead - Brené Brown

Thank you to everyone who voted! Based on members' feedback we will break up the book and have weekly page reading goals. On the dates below, there will be a post to talk about the chapter takeaways, questions, quotes, anything you would like to share with the group!

Week 1 (July 9th): Introduction - Chapter 3

Week 2 (July 16th): Chapter 4 - Chapter 7

Week 3 (July 23): Chapter 8 - Chapter 14

Week 4 (July 30): Chapter 15 - Chapter 20

This book is extremely exciting because there are many resources to further your learning with this book. At https://daretolead.brenebrown.com there are further supplements for the book. There is a helpful assessment called The Daring Leadership Assessment which will help you gauge your strengths and your opportunities for growth as a daring leader. On average, the assessment takes less than ten minutes, and you will be able to print or email the results to yourself.

If you've already read the selected book, you are more than welcome to join us as we discuss the book as a community. You're also welcome to participate in our final live group discussion when we conclude the book, but it is not required.

📚 Our current book selection will always be included in the announcement section.

📚 We will have our final live discussions at the conclusion of our reading schedule. If you’re unable to participate live, you’ll always have an option to participate by answering the questions included in the event section.

📚 Members are encouraged to post freely during the reading period regarding the book as long as you are respectful and kind. Always follow the popular topic for that particular month to locate the discussion questions.

Dare to Lead | Brené Brown The ultimate playbook for developing brave leaders and courageous cultures. Daring leadership is a collection of four skill sets that are 100% teachable. It’s learning and practice that requires brave work, tough conversations, and showing up with our whole hearts.

Friday Book Discussion

What habit are you focusing on right now? How are you making it rewarding?

CHAPTER 8: MAKING A HABIT IRRESISTIBLE

When an opportunity is extremely attractive, it can play a huge role in habit formation. Habits operate in the form of a dopamine-drive feedback loop. Our motivation to do something increases with an increase in dopamine. We do something when we anticipate a reward, not when we fulfill it. We can use temptation bundling to increase the attractiveness of new habits.
After (current habit), I will (habit I need).
After(habit I need), I will habit I want).
For example, if you need to express more gratitude and want to read the news, it will unfold the following way:
After I drink my morning coffee, I will state one thing I am grateful for that happened yesterday (need).
After I state the thing I am grateful for, I will go through the news.
This strategy will enable us to look forward to what we need to do to proceed to what we want to do.

CHAPTER 9: HOW FAMILY AND FRIENDS DETERMINE OUR HABITS

The behaviors that seem most attractive to us are the ones that are a norm of our culture. Humans beings operate in herds and wish to fit in. We want to connect with others and seek their approval. To create better habits, be part of a culture where the behavior you want is the regular behavior and where you have common things with the group already.

CHAPTER 10: DISCOVERING AND RECTIFYING THE CAUSES OF YOUR BAD HABITS

Start by making the bad habit unattractive. Our habits serve as contemporary solutions to age-old desires. The prediction that comes before our habits acts as their cause. For example:
Cue: You notice that the stove is hot.
Prediction: If I touch it I'll get burned, so I should avoid touching it.
Habits become unattractive to us when we link them with positive feelings and unattractive when we link them with negative feelings.

CHAPTER 11: PROCEED SLOWLY BUT NOT BACKWARD

The best way to make learning work is by practicing instead of planning. What matters more, is the number of times we have executed a habit than the time span in which we have been doing it. Keep practicing a habit repeatedly until it becomes automatic.

CHAPTER 12: THE LAW OF LEAST EFFORT

Form an environment where taking the right action is the easiest choice. Lessen resistance to good behaviors. Increase resistance to bad behaviors. Optimize your environment to make future action as easy as possible.

CHAPTER 13: USE THE 2-MINUTE RULE TO STOP PROCRASTINATING

Several habits happen at decisive moments. Decisive moments are choices that can go two ways. They can lead to either a fruitful or unfruitful day. When we initiate a new habit, it must take less than two minutes to carry it out. Follow the two-minute rule. Start a new habit by taking less than two minutes to get it going. Ritualize the start of a process so that you can slide into the deep concentration needed for great things. First, create a habit before trying to make it perfect by just starting a small version of it.

CHAPTER 14: MAKING GOOD HABITS IRRESISTIBLE AND BAD ONES IMPOSSIBLE

Choices that work on a one-time basis, for example, purchasing a new mattress or registering in a savings plan, are sole actions that automate our future habits and lead to amplifying returns over time. Make a bad habit difficult. Automate your behavior to make future returns possible. Use technology to automate your habits.

Join us in this week's chapter discussion!

In chapter 4 we learn about the "Habits Scorecard". Cues that ingite our habits become so common over time that they are invisible. When we create a list of daily habits, such as brushing our teeth, we can then analyze if the habit supports our goals or if it hinders our goals. We need to be aware of habits before we can change them.

In chapter 5 we learn about the preferred manner to begin a new habit. When situation X emerges, I will carry out response Y. A lot of people think they don't have the motivation when they just need the clarity. We can use this strategy in the following way. I will (behavior) at (time) in (location). I will study French for 30 minutes at 5PM in my room. You can use this formula to begin habit stacking. After (current habit), I will (new habit).

In chapter 6 we learn that environment is more important than motivation. Our habits change based on where we are and the cues we notice. Forming clear visual cues can direct our attention towards a required habit. Each habit is triggered by a cue. If you want to drink more water, fill a few water bottles and place them in visible places around the house. Make the cues of good habis aparent in your setting. This will make the context the cue.

In chapter 7 we learn how to approach self-control. Those who have to use their self-control the least have the best self-control. If you watch television escessively, remove the TV from your bedroom. Get rid of the cue that causes a bad habit.

What have been your biggest takeaways so far? What cues will you be adding or removing this week?

"Coffee Hour" with the Author will be held on July 20th at 6:30 PM EDT!

This will be streamed live on the page and group so you can write questions and we can ask them in real-time. This will also provide the opportunity for a replay if you are unable to make the event. We will be holding these sessions at least monthly moving forward.

When this group started many members suggested holding a "Coffee Hour" with authors to learn more about what inspired them to write their books. This would provide an opportunity to ask questions, connect, discuss concepts that the author introduces.

Our next author for "Coffee Hour" is James Kennedy!

Leadership guru Jim Kennedy used a set of tragic events to discover his purpose in life that ultimately led to a new and life-affirming calling as an author and speaker.

Prior to answering the call to become a writer, Jim served in senior leadership and management positions for over twenty-eight years within the federal government and private sectors. He originally hails from Washington, DC, but now calls Austin, Texas, home. When he is not working, Jim is active as a husband, father, dog lover, professional football fan, and supporter of various causes in his community. Follow him online at his website (http://jimkennedyleadershipcafe.com), on Twitter (), on Facebook (JimKennedyLeadershipCafe), and on LinkedIn (jim-kennedy).

Jim will be sharing insights from his most recent book, "Step Into Leadership Greatness: Leadership Isn't Just a Title".

Join us on July 20th for this motivational "Coffee Hour" with the author, James Kennedy, live in the Facebook group!

📚 Discussion Friday 📚

Join in commenting below! This post helps us share ideas and helps us stay on target for finishing the book by the end of the month. If you haven’t started the book, no worries, there is still time to join in. If you have already read the book, help us all stay motivated by sharing your takeaways.

This book revolves around the idea that the quality of our habits decides the quality of our lives. We sometimes believe that we cannot get better or improve our lives because we just do not have the ability to change anything. This book teaches us how to change our habits to live a better and more successful life.

Our habits multiply in their impact with their repetition. They might not seem to make a huge difference in a single day but their impact over the months and years is gigantic.

We run after goals but the best way to accomplish something is to focus on the systems we use instead of goals.

Get 1% better every day because these small improvements will accumulate and make a huge difference in your life. Focus on improving your systems instead of concentrating on your goals.

Most of us try to start changing our habits by altering what we wish to accomplish, which paves the way for outcome-based habits. We need identity-based habits. This means we should start by concentrating on who we want to be.

We might begin a habit because of motivation but we will only stick to it if it finds a place in our identity.

Determine the kind of person you wish to become. Prove it to yourself with the help of small wins.

Formation of a Good Habit
The 1st Law (Cue): Make it apparent/obvious.
The 2nd Law (Craving): Make it appealing/attractive.
The 3rd Law (Response): Make it easy.
The 4th Law (Reward): Make it satisfying.

These four laws provide the framework to change any behavior. They apply to every single field. We don't need separate strategies for different habits.

To avoid bad habits, make them invisible, unappealing, challenging, and unsatisfying.

❓What habit are you working on? How can you be 1% better everyday? What does an identity-based habit look like for you?