The Non-Linear Journey - Grief Support & Recovery

As an Advanced Certified Grief Recovery Specialist® and coach, I help grievers recover from their grief, loss, and heartbreak. I offer 1-to-1 in-person and online support and group programs.

Operating as usual

09/03/2020

Next week!

Upcoming Complimentary Workshop:

We all have a lot of stress, change, and grief during these times of COVID, protesting racism, back-to-school, the upcoming election, and much more. In an effort to do our part to support the community at large through these tumultuous times, advanced certified grief recovery specialists and founders of Yahdav&Hanlon, Kim Hanlon and Ilana Shapiro Yahdav are hosting a complimentary workshop next week.

This will be an opportunity open for all to come with ANY questions about navigating grief personally or in support of others. This includes grief in the workplace and/or with colleagues. Kim and Ilana will also share tips to support both yourself and other grievers. This will be a safe place to voice what's on your heart and share any questions that may be coming up for you both professionally and personally.

Important details:
---Tuesday, Sept. 8th, 2020 @ 10-11am PT
--There is no fee but registration is required to get the Zoom link: https://griefinyourownwordsqa9-8-20.eventbrite.com

We are happy to answer any questions about this either here or offline.

Link in the comments and above. Please share as you are able

speakinggrief.org 07/30/2020

Speaking Grief | Public Media Documentary and Awareness Initative

Speaking Grief is an incredibly powerful and thought-provoking documentary on grief. I recommend this film for EVERY HUMAN. This is an important conversation that we all need to have because it will affect each and every one of us at some point in our lives.

No one is immune from grief. Everyone will experience grief and it's so important to know that the feelings that arise for you are normal and valid. Every grief journey is unique.

We need to be able to honor each other's grief - especially our own - so that we can better connect, unite and support one and other.

Have you watched the documentary? What are your thoughts?

https://speakinggrief.org/

speakinggrief.org Speaking Grief is a public media initiative aimed at creating a more grief-aware society by validating the experience of grievers and helping to guide those who wish to support them.

07/29/2020
06/21/2020

Happy father's day to all the daddies out there - both in heaven and on earth.

This day can be triggering for oh-so many reasons for so many different people: people missing their fathers, widows and widowers missing the father of their child, fathers who’ve lost a child, people who never had a father to begin with, to name a few. And guess what? That's totally okay. You get to feel whatever it is you need to feel and don't need permission or validation from anyone else.

Father's day sort of snuck up on me this year. I kinda thought it was two weeks ago and that I was lucky enough to miss it. To be honest, when I realized that I hadn't, I was a bit bummed and thinking of ways that I could.

But then, I got an email from The Dinner Party asking for volunteers to help with their Fatherless Father's Day Virtual Gathering and I immediately 'heard' my father's voice tell me to do it. (Here is the link to register: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/fatherless-fathers-day-virtual-gathering-with-the-dinner-party-option-b-tickets-109835537048)

Sometimes solitude is super important - as is overindulging and binging on tv - but sometimes, being in community is just as important, if not more so. Being able to serve others, be supported AND fill my own cup is the way to go. Thanks for that reminder, Dad. ❤

Sending all my love today (and always).

06/21/2020

Here are some of the stories of a some of the many people missing their dad on this father's day (and everyday).

https://www.thedinnerparty.org/fathersday2020

To tell and hear stories--to focus, to remember, and to learn--is essentially human. So many of the important cultural moments in our lives--graduations, weddings, birthdays, rallies, funerals--are marked by a sharing of stories. In this community, which we call The Dinner Party, we know firsthand that telling our stories and listening to those of others can also be uniquely healing, both personally and collectively.

This Father's Day, over 50 of us who have lost a Father--whether it be our own father, our children's father, or a father figure--are taking the time to speak their name, say what they did, remember what they stood for, and reflect on how it's been without them so far.

There is a huge amount of beauty in the common patterns of Fatherhood that emerge from the stories and photos below, but actually my favorite thing is that everyone's experience is their own. By remembering each Father exactly as they were--their joys, their quirks, and their struggles--we are able to powerfully name how they lived. And in doing so, we are also doing something for ourselves and each other. We are giving ourselves that special opportunity afforded through storytelling: the opportunity to focus, to remember, and to learn.

With love and gratitude,

Karl Snyder, Dinner Party Host

Come sit with those who have shared their stories here: thedinnerparty.org/fathersday2020
And introduce us to your father, father-figure, or who made you a father, and what life has been without them
#fatherlessfathersday

06/20/2020

💔 Good reminders for people wondering how to show up for their loved ones in the #deaddadsclub.

Some reminders for people wondering how to show up for their loved ones in the #deaddadsclub this weekend (and beyond)

Also checkout our storytelling campaign for Father’s Day with over 50 folks saying their dad’s names, looking back at memories, and reflecting what life has been like without them here: thedinnerparty.org/fathersday2020

letsreimagine.org 06/19/2020

Attend For Free June 22

letsreimagine.org Explore Death. Celebrate Life.

05/20/2020

Thank you San Mateo Area Chamber of Commerce & Pauline Cheung for having us!

I love the work that I get to do; educating people and organizations about how grief shows up in the workplace and helpful tools to work through it.

#corporategrief #griefsupport #griefeducation #grief

greatergood.berkeley.edu 05/18/2020

How to Help Teens Handle the Loss of Proms and Graduations

Teens are mourning a loss of their proms and graduations - which is completely valid. Here are some tips to support the teens in your life.

Note: I am NOT a proponent of the stages of grief (especially as they are often misapplied - a topic for another conversation), but, the way the author applied it in this instance is quite powerful.

greatergood.berkeley.edu Losing these ceremonies is a big deal. We need to help them grieve.

05/15/2020

❤️💜❤️💜 my smile is as big as Kim’s! I echo every sentiment!

Post presentation glow!
.
Love my work!
.
@thenonlinearjourney and I just presented to two groups for Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion. We shared about grief, how it manifests, and how to navigate it in the workplace. We’re proud of our corporate grief and loss program we have developed, and eager to share it!

#grief #griefeducation #griefrecovery #corporatewellness #managers #hr #normalizegrief

05/11/2020

To those whose hearts are hurting today. ❤️

As we look to this weekend and the heaviness that Mother's Day can bring, we'd like to offer some best practices for taking care of those who are without living moms.
Also, check out our story-telling campaign for Mother's Day, now up on our website: bit.ly/tdpmothersday2020

05/10/2020

💜💕💜💕💜💕💜

Happy Mother's Day! 💜

mountpleasantvetgroup.wordpress.com 05/09/2020

9 Things Your Deceased Pet Wants You To Know

Pets are part of the family and it can be devastating when they die. In a few days, it will be the year anniversary of my beloved furbaby, Zeffy (who was originally my dad's cat.) I was thinking how much this article helped me and comforted me after Harry (my orange mountain lion) and Zeffy's death. I wanted to share it in hopes that it may help ease your heart as well, if you're mourning a furbaby. ❤

https://mountpleasantvetgroup.wordpress.com/2015/07/07/9-things-your-deceased-pets-wants-you-to-know/

mountpleasantvetgroup.wordpress.com Excerpt from the beautiful article: “9 Things Your Deceased Pet Wants You To Know” by Susan Petruno. 1. There’s nothing that could have been done differently. Everything that needed to …

05/09/2020

Sending love ❤️

As we look to this weekend and the heaviness that Mother's Day can bring, we'd like to offer some best practices for taking care of those who are without living moms.
Also, check out our story-telling campaign for Mother's Day, now up on our website: bit.ly/tdpmothersday2020

04/23/2020

April is a challenging month for me. I know I’m more sensitive and I’ve come to accept it, especially in the few days leading up to the 28th.

I’m feeling super low energy today and a bit sad, especially after a very triggering text message that I just received.

I think it’s important to share that not every day is easy - and that's okay. Life is not all smiles, but made up of many emotions. Love, pain, happiness and sadness. They are not good or bad, but are.

It’s okay to not be okay. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to be okay. I have sad days, and happy days, and in-between days. I have the gift of memory and love.

I wanted to share a story about my dad and his final promise to me. Thank you for letting me share and show up. ❤️

#28daysofgratitude #thenonlinearjourney

04/22/2020

KTVU Fox 2

💙💔💙

SO SWEET: A nursing home employee noticed one of her residents slept with a photo of his late wife every night, so she got a pillow made with his wife's picture on it -- and the beautiful gift made him burst into tears ❤ STORY: https://bit.ly/2VOFN34

04/21/2020

A few weeks before my bat-mitzvah, I went to Israel on a school trip. My father was one of the chaperones. Israel was probably my dad’s favorite place on this planet and he jumped at every chance he got to go. I was glad he was coming with.

While we were there, there were a series of bombings. It was a bit scary, I must admit. My father picked me up from the group (we were on lockdown in the hostel) and decided we were going to go to the mall.

Now, I have to pause here, and say to anyone who knows my dad, you all know that he did not like malls (or cell phones or shopping).

But in his mind, during difficult times, it was even more important to show our support and do our part to boost morale (and spend some money).

So that’s what we did. We went to every store in the mall, said hello, practiced our Hebrew with our terrible New York accents and did our best to put smiles on people’s faces. He even let me buy some things. It was a great day.

I remember how important it was to him to make sure to have positive interactions with everyone that we came in contact with. And we did.

This is us at my bat-mitzvah a few weeks after that trip. I’m not ashamed that I was a total daddy’s girl (still am).❤️

#28daysofgratitude

04/21/2020

You can be grateful and scared

It's so important to NOT minimize or compare your feelings.

All of your feelings are 100% valid. Your feelings do not negate someone else's feelings and vice versa.

There is no rule that you have to be grateful.

You can be grateful and scared. You can be grateful and angry. These are not mutually exclusive feelings. It's okay to feel both.

It's okay to feel however you are feeling. Self-compassion is imperative.

Have you ever minimized your own feelings of loss or compared your loss?

(Important note: this is NOT to pass judgement on yourself, but to build the awareness muscle.)

sfchronicle.com 04/14/2020

Virtual grieving: Is there closure if there is no goodbye?

"There is research on the experience of grief in isolation. Those who must mourn alone will be more likely to experience anxiety, depression and complicated grief, which is when people struggle to integrate their loss into their identity. While most experts say that there is no clear timeline for grief, being alone and isolated will most certainly extend it.

There are resources available for those who want to confront these difficult realities and begin the grieving process."

Read this thoughtful piece by Shoshana Ungerleider.

sfchronicle.com “Saying goodbye to our loved ones is an incredibly important part of the grief process. When this is impeded, mourners are often left grappling with feelings of guilt, anger and anxiety.”

cameronmoll.com 04/14/2020

My Non-Linear Grief Journey: A Daughter’s Love - Cameron Moll

"Grief, and life, are both non-linear journeys and it’s so important to remember that we aren’t alone - even when we feel like it - and that feelings are normal and natural and that it’s totally more than okay to not be okay for as long as you need."

Here is an article that I wrote about my father's death. Thank you Cameron Moll for letting me share my story. I hope that it brings comfort to another griever.

cameronmoll.com This article was written by guest author, Ilana Shapiro Yahdav, MPA, ACGRS, for our Performant Mental Health series.

linkedin.com 04/14/2020

The Power of FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is a huge part of grief recovery. We forgive to give ourselves peace. Forgiveness is not forgetting. Forgiveness is not condoning. Forgiveness is for us, our hearts, our souls. It is not about whether the person 'deserves' it or not, but that we complete the pain related to experience for ourselves.

linkedin.com In the past I couldn’t understand why in the courtroom family members could forgive murderers of their beloved ones. Now, I understand it very well.

04/13/2020

Powerful. So very, very powerful.

This.

04/12/2020

Sadness in kids manifests in different ways as does sadness in adults.

Kids emotions about COVID-19 may look like this

eventbrite.com 04/09/2020

Virtual Community Grief Support Circle

We are all grieving right now. We are all experiencing loss of some form. Let’s come together and support each other. Together, we can heal.

Join Kim English Hanlon and me tonight (Thursday) for our second Community Grief Support Circle at 8pm.

Please register to get the Zoom link: https://lnkd.in/gsGtCDp

Together, we can support one and other.

#griefsupport #anxiety #loneliness #mentalhealth

eventbrite.com A virtual drop-in support group to normalize grief, combat loneliness and feel supported as we navigate these unprecedented times. Ask questions. Share your thoughts. Listen to others. Know you’re not alone and supported by a loving community. Join Ilana Shapiro Yahdav, MPA, ACGRS of The Non-Linea...

03/31/2020

Together we can heal. ❤️💕

Join for a weekly Community Grief Support Circle.

Thursdays, 8pm PT.

Normalize grief. Combat loneliness. Ask questions. Feel supported in uncertain times.

Write a comment to receive a Zoom link for this special healing call.

mailchi.mp 03/31/2020

End Well Live: Self Care During Crisis

Self-care is very important, especially during a crisis. Don't miss Shoshana Ungerleider and Claire Bidwell Smith as they share important tools - specifically for healthcare workers - to help care for yourself during this difficult and uncertain time.

mailchi.mp Clinicians across the country are reporting heightened levels of anxiety and fear during this very stressful time. We want to help! Join us for a conversation and gain tools to help you and your loved ones cope.

ericahensley.wordpress.com 03/30/2020

New and old grief in the age of coronavirus

Very beautifully articulated.

https://ericahensley.wordpress.com/2020/03/30/new-and-old-grief-in-the-age-of-coronavirus/?fbclid=IwAR1cjHhne6_dFU6vQ9pEEC9kz9fkgnXn5-3HEFU3YpiCRebxFg3LGrrTbb4

ericahensley.wordpress.com I meant to put this to paper on Thursday, the real anniversary. But these days of public health reporting amidst a pandemic keep so busy, and the drops of free time devoted to making sure friends a…

03/28/2020

There’s a lot of uncertainty right now which can have a magnifying effect on anything that weighs on our hearts. For me, I think about what my dad would do and say right now and it hurts my heart to know that I can't ask him. I know that if I don’t catch myself, I am susceptible to absorbing other people’s anxiety. I think we all are in some way.⁣

I was walking the other day - trying to get my daily dose of fresh air - and passed by someone (6ft away of course). I smiled warmly at her. She just stared at me - almost through me - and kept walking. I felt a pit form in my stomach but decided to keep smiling at people in hopes that maybe it would brighten their day and my day. The next person I passed, I caught his eyes and smiled warmly. He smiled warmly back and we both walked away smiling a bit broader. My heart felt a bit lighter. I hope his did too.⁣

🌻All it takes is a small gesture. That gesture is so contagious. I’m hoping that the next person he sees, he smiles warmly so that the path of smiles continues.

It’s all about the small gestures - especially in times like this. Let’s spread smiles. Let’s spread love. We are all in this together.⁣

💕We need to be 6 feet apart physically, but not mentally. We can still smile, love and be connected.

hbr.org 03/24/2020

That Discomfort You’re Feeling Is Grief

We are Experiencing many levels of uncertainty. We are experiencing loss of safety. Our daily lives have changed. Our routines and schedules are now no longer what they were: working from home , sheltering in place, homeschooling children. There are a lot of different things that have changed and a lot of layers of grief. It’s important to name it and give the emotion motion to move through you.

hbr.org The coronavirus pandemic has led to a collective loss of normalcy.

Welcome to the Non-Linear Journey

My grief journey began in 2007 when I lost my father to cancer, the day after my twenty-fourth birthday. His parting words were, "time is non-linear, and I'll always be with you." For many years, I struggled to find my way through my grief maze. I found some healthy outlets for my grief including starting a memorial scholarship fund in my father's name (I've raised over $92K!) and running the NYC Marathon. Despite my best efforts and amazing family and friends, I still felt incredibly lonely and isolated. During this time, I promised myself that when I found ways to heal my heart, I'd do everything in my power to help other broken-hearted people heal and learn to live again in their new normal.

On the eve of my father's ten-year anniversary, I found the Grief Recovery Method ® which gave me the tools that I had been searching for to really begin my recovery and heal my broken heart. It also helped me fulfill my promise to myself of being able to help others overcome loss and grief by becoming a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist ® and founding my grief recovery practice, The Non-Linear Journey.

Grief is a non-linear journey that is unique for every single person. Grief Recovery does not mean that you'll ever forget your loved one, or never feel sad. It means that you'll learn the tools to feel better and heal your broken heart.

I'm proud to offer a variety of GRM programs serving the San Mateo-San Francisco Bay Area, including in-person 1-on-1's, Grief Support Groups, Helping Children With Loss, and Pet Loss Support Groups.

Videos (show all)

April is a challenging month for me. I know I’m more sensitive and I’ve come to accept it, especially in the few days le...
You can be grateful and scared
The missing peice of productivity
We are all in this together
‘Spread love and not animosity’ (I’ve always loved the Black Eyed Peas.) 🔹To be clear this is not a political post.🔹But ...
Debunking the ‘i need/must do it alone’ myth
Grieving and the WeekendWhen grieving, the weekend can feel like a welcome refuge or a terrifying vast amount of time to...
Behind the scenes and some updates ❤️
Check in on those you love. All it takes is a small gesture that can change someone’s day. We are all in this together. ...
The Ripple Effect of Kindness What act of kindness can you do for yourself or someone else this weekend? Let’s work toge...
Father’s Day check-in. How are you today?

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