Humanimal Academy

The truth is, any of us can go through infidelity at any moment. The important thing here isn’t to obsess about how to not let others hurt us, but instead, to work on the relationship with ourselves.

When you are at peace with yourself, when you are following your dreams, speaking your true, being yourself, choosing consciously who you spent time with, and doing the things that you love and you want, none will ever break your heart. Instead, everything will be an opportunity to grow and become a better version of yourself, be more compassionate with for yourself and others 💗

If you are finding too many odd behaviors and new likes the are chances that those new likes and ideas belong to someone else, this doesn't necessarily mean your partner is cheating, but potentially emotionally involved with someone else.

Here is the thing, I personally think that having external people out of the relationship to support you is healthy, however, this is a couple of conversations to have. when does it become cheating?

1. Emotional infidelity
2. Sexual infidelity
3. Online sexting
4. P**n

Whatever suspicious you are having, remain calm and find a way to communicate your fears, if your partner really loves you he will give you the reassurance you need, or at least speak about your fear, but remember all depends on your approach, none will react cool when being judged, so one more time, stay calm and be smart 💙

The truth is that anyone can go through this traumatic experience, but not everyone reacts the same.

The only way you can avoid being surprised by the affair or betrayal of someone you love is by making sure you are the main priority and you love yourself unconditionally.

This is how it works when you love yourself:

1. Others Respect you more
2. Others give you their honest attention and care
3. They know you don't go around being someone you are not, so not chance to play games with you
4. You are more resilient
5. You don't take things personal
6. You are more at ease
7. You can love deeply and unconditionally
8. You don't expect others to feel you up
9. You can be in solitude, instead of isolation
10. Your life is more harmonious and abundant
11. You can appreciate the beauty in everything
12. You don't need validation
13. The list goes on and on.....

What is the lesson then? LOVE YOURSELF FIRST IF YOU WANT OTHERS TO LOVE YOU ❤️❤️‍🩹

I will be completely honest with you on this one, are you ready?

If you do this, there is a big chance that your self-esteem has been deeply wounded and now all you are doing is looking for reason to please your ego that is terrified and scared of being betrayed again. The sad thing about this behaviour is that it set you up to hurt yourself more and more. potentially becoming a pattern from there on.

I know, I get it, going through infidelity can be very painful. I personally went through this traumatic experience twice. I know the wound can be deep and the reactions as a consequence can be almost uncontrollable. But I can tell you by experience that no matter how much you push to get more out of them if you do it from a hurt place you will only cause more pain to yourself and your partner. THIS IS UNNECESSARY.

Instead, start by healing the trauma, and the trauma can not be healed by putting your finger inside the wound and spinning it around. instead:

1. Take some time off, ask your partner to give you time to think
2. Attend your trauma directly by working with a mental health professional
3. Self-care is more needed than ever
4. Re-think your most important values and what you want for your future
5. Be easy on yourself, there isn't need to solve all at once

You deserved to be loved, but first, you gotta believe that again, whatever you do, don’t base your self-esteem and security on someone else, YOU GOT THIS, I got your back ❤️‍🩹❤️

Photos from Humanimal Academy's post

I never thought I could lose one of my parents growing up, until my mum got sick of cancer and died 2 years later 😞

Unfortunately, we have these false beliefs that make us thing that we are safe from cheat and death.

I personally used to think that being a good boy will assure me a happy and good life, and the true is that the world is more complicated than that.

I was being naive by thinking that being a people pleasure and being a "good boy" would save me from others betraying me and disrespecting me. Let's be honest, this world is wonderful, and full of beauty, however, we can not forget the ugliness, the ugliness is part of this world. and ignoring it and thinking it won't ever touch you is setting up yourself for learning in the hard way ❤️‍🩹

Your partner cheated on you and he doesn't want to share with you everything you want him to share with you?

The most common reason is that you are allowing your feelings to lead, and this probably feels more than the obvious things to do, as the intense feelings that you can be experiencing after being betrayed and almost uncontrollable. However, here is where your ability to regulate yourself comes handy.

you will need:
1. give yourself time to plan
2. Prepare properly to ask the right questions
3. Write down questions you want to ask
4. Whatever you hear, remain calm and try to look beyond your emotions

Only then you will know for sure if you are taking the right decision in staying.

Whatever you have chosen to do, I want to remind you that you are the priority, your mental and emotional health are at stake, take the time to heal yourself ❤️‍🩹

I'll be honest in this one, it isn't an easy approach, and you probably think "my partner won't ever be honest with me" however what I have found from experience is that effective communication starts from you. if you want to create honest and open communication with your partner you have to be honest first.

Sharing how you feel shouldn't be something to be shameful of. As long as you communicate it with respect and help your partner see your fears in regard this, you could achieve a lot more than obsessing and turning the house upside down.

If he calls you crazy paranoic or something like that after you have asked with calmness and respect, and you have been completely honest in sharing your thoughts, there are 2 things that you can do:

1. You address the communication problem by working with a professional
2. You leave

It isn't worth staying in a relationship that only has the potential to be good. This may be robbing you from living the life of your dreams, DON'T LET THAT HAPPEN ❤️‍🩹

None want to go through something as traumatic as this.

However, in some instances and some relationships, it is necessary to open a way for the two or for one of the partners.

Some people are afraid of communicating their needs and fantasies, this ends up firing them back.

Some people don't have or don't make an effort to communicate effectively which ends in:

Problem + bad communication + Tentation = Infidelity

I want to emphasise here the importance of good communication. Two people come together because each of them on a certain level helps the other feel whole, however when we don’t know what we want and what we need, and worse, we don’t know how to ask and how to communicate these, we can easily end up being the cheater or the cheated on.

If you are struggling to move forward after the trauma of infidelity, I would like to share with you my FREE guide “The 3 reasons why you haven’t been able to overcome infidelity” You can find it in my bio 😊🫶

This issue is more common than sometimes we can imagine.
According to polls, 40% of affairs only last 6 months.

what does this tell us?

There is a common reason why this adultery happens, and like I always say to you, the offended partner, this isn't on you to carry however, it is your responsibility to make the most informed and wise decision possible I understand how overwhelming this situation can be, but understanding that a partner who decides to cheat is an indication that the relationship isn't going on well, or a relationship in between you shouldn't exist at all.

Perhaps it served you to look at yourself in the mirror, but you can not keep recreating the emotional and even physical abuse over and over again.

It is your decision, and you are the only one who has the power to change the feelings and behaviors which have allowed someone else to pay you back poorly.

You deserve more but only if you believe you do ❤️‍🩹

Sometimes you may think the easiest and less harmful way is to stay after you have been cheated on, it may seem in your head that breaking up is too many complications and you will probably feel lonely and unsafe.

You are probably right, however, if you stay after a betrayal you don't want to stay in a relationship where your partner doesn't listen to you and doesn't do what is needed to repair the relationship. After all, he has been who contributed the most to breaking the trust between the both of you.

If you decided to stay make sure you address communication in between you and your partner, because the truth is that if you don't, you will probably end up in the same situation; finding your partner unconscious or conscious behaviour to let you that you are not everything he wants in his life.

Remember, this isn't about you, however, this is your responsibility. DON'T LET NO MAN to be your source of happiness or security 💃🔥

Sometimes we expect others to be mind readers, and in the process, we manage to create a story in our head about how our partner doesn't love us, or even worse, our partner is probably cheating on us.

Instead of waiting for your partner to feel your needs and magically guess what it is that you want, ask him directly, can I have a hug?

I would never say no to my partner if she wants some affection, what's more, I would really value my partner's openness and vulnerability ❤️

Any couple is perfect

Always is necessary to take time to spend some time together and talk about what each one is feeling.

Sometimes each person lives an individual problem that affects the relationship.

Talking is always very important.

Welcome to this space where YOU are the priority.

If you have been battling with yourself for years, and as a result of this, you have lost the connection with yourself and the confidence in yourself, I assure you that here you will find the tools and answers to return to being that girl without fear, that girl who believed that nothing is impossible 🔥

Your confidence and self-love live within you, you just have to knock on the door 🚪 to reconnect with your true self ❤️

If you are a woman, you have come to this earth with a great gift, and it is not fair that because of your your surrounding, past, traumas, lack of support or whatever it is, this gift is forgotten. You and I know that you are perfect, you and I know that you are unique and special!

Allow me to be part of the reunion with yourself ❤️‍🩹

I used to think this of myself and I got myself armed and prepare to be my best self, that was my motivation, to feel capable and to feel enough 💪

what is your motivation?

When will you accept that life can be also beautiful if you face the difficulties and challenges that came with the life experiences that only you faced and keep facing every single day.

Give yourself some credit for what you have accomplish but don’t stay to confortable, if you don’t learn to walk through the fire you always get burn easily with the minimum change of circumstances 🥵

You work so much everyday so why is it that you can not inspire others through your work? 🤔

Even the worst moments are art, that is what you have to convince yourself of 🖼

If you fail to prepare you will prepare to fail ❌

If you know socialising is one thing which you struggle with, but you still want to connect and meet new people it is worth to have some question in place to remember when anxiety creeps in 🗣

Brake the cycle, you can be a hero 🦸‍♀️

Put your other cheek doesn’t mean you allow people to step on you, it means you accept people has traumas and they have developed armours to protect themselves.

By being kind to the unkind you are helping them lower the guard and let their hearts out 🥰

Still resenting your past and things that you were told?

How long for will you believe this lie?

Adopting kindness as my value number one hasn’t been easy, initially people took advantage of it , then later people thought I was fake. Now I think It is who I am and I won’t change it.

If you don’t try you’ll never learn of your mistakes.

You either remain stuck or you allow yourself to struggle and feel the satisfaction of becoming a better you 🤩

Be you, if you are a weirdo just like me who sees beauty everywhere then be it 💙❤️🧡💚

This society needs people like you 🤗

What if instead of thinking what if everything goes wrong you start thinking what if everything can go better than it has? 🤭🤔🤩

Slide left and find out what power can really do in yo your life ❤️💚🤞

Don’t get fool into thinking power is the devil, everything around you is moved by power, you are power and you can turn your attention to it and raise up like a fénix ❤️‍🔥🔥

Take responsibility of your decision, if you are something you supposed not to, why do you punish yourself through feeling bad about yourself? 😨

Own your decision and your choices, if you are not happy about something you have done then learn from the lesson and change your behaviour 💪

Don’t remain in victim mode, or is it what you want to do every time something bad happens to you? 🤔

I always thought of myself as a insecure person, but my perception has bring changing over the years as I work myself up from so trauma in my past 💪

I realised that I’m not insecure, I realised that I’ve got fear like everyone else, fear of being humiliated, laugh at, criticised and ultimately being not loved 😣

I’m CONFIDENT and not insecure because I feel the fear and I do it anyway, I understand that we all feel it regardless of how we look from the outside, you are not alone on this, and as you open up you find those who also want to share with you their fears 💙🧡❤️💛💚❤️‍🔥

In this new year are you ready to be responsable for your own results, or will you instead keep being the victim of the circumstances?

Where there is a will there is a way 💪

Stop being scare and start living, behind that fear is so much love, joy and satisfaction you can gain from being you 🤗