Joy of Living

Joy of Living

Bemerkungen

A wonderful day in San Francisco with a dear new friend.❤️
One month today in this beautiful place with my wonderful companion.
I feel deeply grateful for everything we are experiencing.
The process of writing a book together is taking me and us into places I have not dared to visit before.
I never felt enough confidence and trust to face them.
Now, with him, I feel safe enough to encounter all of them.
What a blessing it is to be in the presence of love and trust inside myself.
My heart is full, and my mind is surrendering❤️
In writing our book we often encounter challenging parts in ourselves.
We take breaks in nature and culture to recharge and get some perspective again.
I am in the middle of a life changing process again.
When I look at my life, I have gone through many of them, starting at the age of 18, when I decided to study psychology, leave my family,
which was something no one in my family had ever done, not to speak of the community.
People didn't even know the word.
Consequently, I grew away from my tribe.
I never regretted it, it saved my life.
Many times after that I took life changing decisions.
All of them were accompanied by fear, anxiety, nightmares, but all of them resulted in me ending up better than I was before.
How was I able to do these big jumps?
I think part of it is that I have a lot of courage, and when my heart is calling, I trust it and follow through.
Not easy, but always, with no exception, leading to the better.
I have made it my purpose to encourage others to live the life they truly desire, despite obstacles, trauma, fears.
Never give up!
Trust your heart!
Dare healing!
Dare to live!
I am in the middle of a life changing process again.
When I look at my life, I have gone through many of them, starting at the age of 18, when I decided to study psychology, leave my family,
which was something no one in my family had ever done, not to speak of the community.
People didn't even know the word.
Consequently, I grew away from my tribe.
I never regretted it, it saved my life.
Many times after that I took life changing decisions.
All of them were accompanied by fear, anxiety, nightmares, but all of them resulted in me ending up better than I was before.
How was I able to do these big jumps?
I think part of it is that I have a lot of courage, and when my heart is calling, I trust it and follow through.
Not easy, but always, with no exception, leading to the better.
I have made it my purpose to encourage others to live the life they truly desire, despite obstacles, trauma, fears.
Never give up!
Trust your heart!
Dare healing!
Dare to live!
Please join me for a great experience!
3 weeks in this beautiful place.
I have everything I need.
I am happy.
I feel that I am collecting the bountiful harvest of my life.
I am grateful and deeply content.
There is nothing more that I desire.
All I want is to make the best of the remainder of our lives.
Writing this book together is huge part of it.
I think it will be the most special book that has ever been written.
In many aspects.
Written from our hearts.
❤️❤️
Late afternoon stroll in the nearby park....
Always delightful and refreshing.
Watching people, dogs, a man who is trying to make a kite fly without any wind.
I love those moments of quiet and reflection.
I am happy.
Great

The 'Joy of Living Institute' teaches how to live a fulfilled, happy life. I support you to find you

I have created this page to support people to live a joyful, fulfilled life. After many years of experiencing so many ups and downs myself, and also seeing this in the lives of others, all I can say is this: The only purpose of living is to live fully, with all your heart, all your talents, dedicated, joyful and ecstatic! I have had many teachers, and those who I learned from the most were those

Wie gewohnt öffnen

Timeline photos 28/05/2023

Timeline photos

"Death can come at any minute, in any way. We do not know what is in store tomorrow, or, whether there is a tomorrow, or even a tonight! But still, we have the golden present. Now we are alive and kicking. What should we do now? Love all, serve all." -Sri Swami Satchidananda

📷: Abdulmomn Kadhim

Subscribe via https://bit.ly/wordfortheday

26/05/2023

Bebé y padre emparentados

Bonding

16/05/2023

I’M SORRY

Many years ago
when I believed that I was
“fully enlightened" and
"beyond ego"

(get the joke?)

I had a mantra:

"Never Say Sorry
and Never Apologise"

I believed that I was perfect
Beyond humanity
Beyond reproach

And there was "nobody here",
of course, who could make mistakes

no “separate self” who ever needed
to apologise for anything at all
(since everything is always perfect
and the Universe doesn’t make mistakes)

If anybody ever had a problem with 'me'
If anybody was hurt by something ‘I’ had said or done
It must have been

THEIR projection
THEIR ego
THEIR un-enlightenment
THEIR ignorance
THEIR suffering and illusory separate self
THEIR utter lack of realisation

That's what I believed, anyway
(I also believed that
I had no beliefs anymore!)

I was attracted to "radical" and "uncompromising" spiritual teachers
who acted unkindly and inhumanely
behind the scenes
and never apologised
and never seemed bothered at all
and didn’t feel grief or anger or shame
like the rest of us

and never fell to their knees
to ask for help

How enlightened they appeared to be!
How free of struggle and awkwardness and pain!
How cool and calm and detached!
How unaffected by the sh*tty mess of life!
How protected from the joys and pains of intimate, messy, awkward, earthy, human relationships!

But, friends, when did saying sorry
and making amends
and listening deeply to the one in front of us
and admitting mistakes
and meeting each other in deep humility and joyful doubt
and embracing shared pain
and weeping together
and confessing raw human truth
and sharing our faults
and undergoing deep and painful therapy and self-reflection
and voicing healthy shame
(yes, HEALTHY shame!)
and saying “I don’t have the answers, I’m as lost as you are, my love”
ever become the Original Sins of enlightenment?

When did spiritual awakening lose its humanity, humility and humour?

When did enlightenment become the ultimate justification for a buried, raging ego?

When did empathy become a dirty word?

Back then, I held ‘others' at a distance
with my refusal to truly engage
(and I claimed that
there were "no others"
with whom to engage)

like a well-trained Advaitically-correct robot
perfectly denying
the perfectly imperfect
human heart
and its perfect longings

and its perfect grief-infused joy

It was a disconnected Oneness
A recognition with no true love
(although I spoke of love)
A fire without warmth or s*x or passion
(although I spoke of embodiment)
A half-assed awakening

A sorry
state of affairs

It was a lie,
a myth, a joke, a terrible fraud
And I fell for it all then
And I was younger then

And so it's such a relief
(yes, relief!)
these days
to look into the eyes of a friend,
my partner, a family member,
and to be able to say,
and really, truly mean:

I’M
SORRY.

- Jeff Foster

Sakino on Sunday - Random thoughts and reflections on love 13/05/2023

Sakino on Sunday - Random thoughts and reflections on love

A new Sakino on Sunday video is out!
I hope you enjoy🌸

Sakino on Sunday - Random thoughts and reflections on love A year ago my life changed because I followed my heart and moved to California to live with the man I love. In this video I share some of my thoughts and ref...

23/02/2023

THERE IS NO TABLE LONG ENOUGH

One man’s unspoken inner edge of darkness
un-confronted and un-transformed
sitting far away in his own fear,
like someone looking through
the wrong end of a child’s telescope,
like someone sitting at the end
of an absurdly lengthened table,
holds his intimate circle in fear of death
and torture, threatens their families,
poisons their lives along with his enemies,
sews everyone into the straight jacket
of immobile fear, then carefully tailors
a uniform of death for every single one
of his bullied, fool young men to wear.

May we see then, in this allegory,
as we too, in this time, sit so far away,
from everything that seems to matter,
the simple way an individual life
no matter how imprisoned,
transformed by generosity,
can draw every single chair up-close
and simply by drawing everyone close
save so many unborn future lives.

May we take the time, while we confront
this fear now, on the outside
with necessary and courageous physical action,
to preempt any future evil by bringing
everyone hidden at the edges into the light,
and into the shared and hospitable warmth,
may we bring every distant trouble
into the conversation where heads are allowed
to lean close to one another at a table
shortened and rounded and shared
to the point of mutual understanding.

There is no table long enough
to keep us from our own unspoken darkness
but thanks to the overwhelming vulnerabilities
of life, and every power beyond us, there is no table
long enough to hold the riches of a darkness
transformed by welcome, to hold the wine raised
and the bread offered, to hold every item
of our shared bounty brought from every field
of our endeavour into the light of every single
promise we have made to make our future,
a future that despite ourselves,
and despite our present, desperate struggle,
is always destined to forgiveness.

David Whyte

..

НЕМАЄ СТОЛУ ДОВЖЕЛЕЗНОГО НАСТІЛЬКИ

Невисловлений темний край пітьми
сидить всередині людини однієї,
не протиставлений, не змінений ніким,
в полоні страхів власних та ідеї.
Мов у дитячий телескоп не в той кінець
хтось дивиться далеко із-за столу,
безглуздо довгого. А сам, на вигляд мрець,
лякає смертю все своє найближче коло.
Ляка тортурами, погрожує родинам,
життя отруюючи “друзям” й ворогам,
усіх в сорочку гамівну вдяга насильно,
у форму смерті – молодих, руки по швах.

Нехай узріємо в цій алегорії усі,
що ми так само зараз сидимо далеко,
і неважливо, чи хто в’язень у пітьмі,
усе ж уникнути можливо небезпеки.
Стільці посунувши і просто ближче ставши,
великодушність запросивши у життя,
цю недосяжність простотою розірвавши,
урятувати можна наше майбуття.

Хай стане часу нам на цей двобій зі страхом,
цієї миті, в цьому зовнішньому світі,
вдягнувши з мужності і дій фізичних лати,
усім запобігти майбутнім лихам.
Та показати світло тим, хто в темнім краї,
теплом гостинності і спільності зігріти.
Щоб за столом, вже круглим, як у зграї,
сидіти опліч, щоб почути й зрозуміти.

Немає столу довжелезного настільки,
щоб віддалити нас від власної пітьми.
Життя вразливість, сила кожного і стійкість
його влаштує нам такої довжини,
що темрява підкориться щедротам,
вино і хліб, і нагороди за труди,
розділені на всіх, їх стане доти,
допоки місце за столом є доброті,
допоки кожен з нас тримає своє слово,
заради завтра, попри наше сьогодення,
бо ж відчайдушна боротьба обов’язково
завжди приводить у кінці всіх до прощення.

Автор: Девід Уайт
Український переклад: Ірина Худа

Many, many thanks to Natalia Orlova and Iryna Khuda for the Ukrainian Translation.

09/01/2023

Yes❤️

The most beautiful quality of all in a human being, in my humble opinion?

The ability to listen deeply.

To listen from Presence. From stillness.

To listen without trying to fix someone, or change them, or ‘save’ them.

The ability to allow another to be exactly as they are.

Not giving unsolicited advice. Not lecturing them about the latest psychological research or the ‘most true’ spiritual teaching. Not trying to mould them, manipulate them into matching a concept of who they ‘should’ be. Not projecting your own trauma - or traumatic answers - all over them.

Just listening. Listening with an open mind and an open heart and a receptive nervous system.
Allowing them to breathe, to express, to weep, to question, to be completely unique, to expand into the space, to discover their own truth.

I have met world experts in intimacy, relationships and honest communication who are unable to do this.
I have met spiritual gurus, so-called “enlightened masters”, expert psychologists and life coaches who are utterly unable to do this.
I have met popular teachers and authors on ‘listening from the heart’, ‘holding space’, ‘pure awareness’ and ‘embodied spirituality’ who are unable to do this.

It is a rare gift - the ability to allow others to be exactly as they are.
Broken. Whole. Sad. Angry. Afraid. Lost. Awake or asleep. Whatever.
To listen to them with every fibre of your being.
To receive them through the senses, to listen like the wild animals of the forest.
To swaddle them in undistracted, fascinated attention.
To envelop them in a silent, warm Presence.
To make them feel - in those precious moments that you are together - like they are the most beloved One in the whole Universe.

When you sense this kind of sacred listening from someone, it’s unmistakable.

It cannot be manufactured.
It cannot be faked.
It is utterly rare and holy.
It is nothing less than unconditional love.

Your nervous system senses it and rejoices.

- Jeff Foster

Photo: Jeff and Alice ❤️✨🙏🏻

21/12/2022

Winter Solstice with Rilke

You, darkness, of whom I am born —

I love you more than the flame
that limits the world
to the circle it illumines
and excludes all the rest.

But the darkness embraces everything:
shapes and shadows, creatures and me,
people, nations — just as they are.

It lets me imagine
a great presence stirring beside me.

I believe in the night.

~ Rainer Maria Rilke, from The Book of Hours
translated by Joanna Macy and Anita Burrows
Photograph by George Jisho Robertson.

***********

ORIGINAL:

Du Dunkelheit, aus der ich stamme,
ich liebe dich mehr als die Flamme,
welche die Welt begrenzt,
indem sie glänzt
für irgendeinen Kreis,
aus dem heraus kein Wesen von ihr weiß.

Aber die Dunkelheit hält alles an sich:
Gestalten und Flammen, Tiere und mich,
wie sie's errafft,
Menschen und Mächte -

Und es kann sein: eine große Kraft
rührt sich in meiner Nachbarschaft.

Ich glaube an Nächte.

20/12/2022

Have we lost touch of the beauty of an aging woman? She is powerful beyond measure; she has an essence about her that screams strength, wisdom and knowledge. She is a role model, she has many stories to tell. She shines where she stands. She is outrageous, she is wild, but most importantly she is free of the demands that society puts on her. She is confident; she believes in herself, she lives her life by her own set of rules.

She finally becomes comfortable and settles into her life. She gets this time to experience things that she felt that she never could before because now the rules have changed. Her life is written on the lines on her face, the grey in her hair, and the age on her hands, and the shape of her body changes but it doesn't mean that it cannot be loved.

Why do we not look up to these women? We can learn from them and be inspired by them, and understand that age only strengthens beauty. It’s time to praise these women for what they have been through; they have survived life, for they are the brightest shining lights leaving their mark, with grace, charm and elegance. So here’s to the older woman, may she continue to shine.

~ Mary Costanza

[Art: Jonas Peterson utilizing AI]

Photos from Joy of Living's post 16/12/2022

Being a therapist sometimes - often - is a big challenge, even after 45 years of practicing.
What do I do, when a client is continuously projecting all his unresolved issues with his mother onto me?
Especially his anger? At the age of 85?!
Not a single sign of change?
After years of therapy with several therapists?

How do I deal with my own feelings?

Do I resign?
Do I stay and just be with him?
Addressing it?

Today I went for a long walk, looked at the beautiful nature and the California sun - the sun keeps shining no matter what.

And taking a break before the session - ahhhhhhhhhh.......

I wonder how the therapists among you deal with challenging situations in your work🙏

An hour later: Big breakthrough in the session! Change can happen at any age!!!

Sakino on Sunday - Sharing my life story 12/11/2022

Sakino on Sunday - Sharing my life story

Today was the start of the 3. module of my 'Heal your Roots' Family Constellation and Trauma Healing Training - in person in Berlin.
It was wonderful to meet in physical reality again.
As always in the training, I shared my own life story with the participants. This time I chose a particular time in my life to talk about. I want to share it with you too, and if you have any responses I am happy to hear from you.

https://youtu.be/0Vb4SZDQB54

As always, I wish you a good Sunday and take good care for yourself and your loved ones. Our time together is short and precious, don't waste it.

Sakino on Sunday - Sharing my life story In my 'Heal your Roots' Training I always share my own life story with the participants. This time I told about a specific period in my life, which was very ...

07/09/2022

if abandonment is the core wound

the disconnection from mother

the loss of wholeness

then the most potent medicine

is this ancient commitment

to never abandon

yourself

to discover wholeness in the whole-mess

to be a loving mother

to your insides

to hold the broken bits

in warm open awareness

and to illuminate the sore places

with the light

of love

- jeff foster

Photos from Joy of Living's post 02/09/2022

Taking a position.
Not always easy.
Being true to myself.
Even if it means that I am alone.
Being authentic is more important than anything.
I have and always will express when I learn about any kind of misuse of power by people who are so called teachers or spiritual leaders.
As teachers we have the highest responsibilty for our clients and for our own behavior and for our own healing.
Please, work on yourself first before you go out and teach.

22/08/2022

This is a truth that I have discovered in the past years.
And it is also relieving, because it doesn't keep you stuck in places that aren't nourishing.
But it takes courage to let go.
I know and I have done it!

09/08/2022

ON ABUSE AND SPIRITUALITY

"You attracted pain because you desired or deserved it".
"If you ever think there's a problem with another's words or behaviours,
YOU are always the one who's confused".
"Everything is always just your projection. Everything is in your mind".
"Clear up your vibration and you'll stop attracting bad things to yourself".
"You are too attached to the body. Go beyond the body. It's not who you are."
"If you have doubts, fears, resistance, pain, anger, then you must be in your ego and totally unenlightened".
"The past is an illusion. Let it go right now!".

I'm so tired of all this New Age bullsh*t.
I'm tired of ANY spirituality that doesn't fully honour
our messy, unresolvable, first-hand, real-time, embodied human experience.
That doesn't bow deeply to the struggle of our raw and tender hearts.
That guilt-trips us for our imperfections and shames our limitations.

No, it's not always your projection.
Yes, sometimes other people really ARE abusive and you need to move away or set clearer boundaries.

No, everything isn't always "in your mind".
Yes, your body matters. Your feelings too.

No, your doubts and fears are not 'wrong' or 'bad' or 'unevolved'.
No, you do not 'attract' abuse through a faulty 'vibrational frequency'.
No, you do not deserve to be violated in any way, in the name of Truth, in the name of God, in the name of Love, or IN ANY OTHER NAME.

Yes, your boundaries deserve to be respected, your 'yes' AND your 'no' too.

No, it's not okay for spiritual teachers to abuse people "for their own good"
- to shock them into awakening, to enlighten them, to help them drop their "ego".
Teachers that use abuse as a tool are simply abusers, not teachers.

I reject any spirituality that dismisses our tender, vulnerable, fragile humanity.
I reject any spirituality that shames us for our precious human thoughts and feelings.
I reject any spirituality that begins any sentence with "If you were enlightened..."
I reject any spirituality that divides self from no self, divine from human, sacred from profane, absolute from relative, heaven from earth, duality from nonduality, material from spiritual.

I once saw a popular spiritual teacher addressing a recently bereaved woman.
He said, "Your heartbreak is illusory and only the activity of the separate self.
One day the separate self will vanish, along with all suffering".

And in that moment, I saw a deep, deep sickness and inhumanity at the heart of contemporary spirituality. The invalidation of trauma, the false promises, the power games, the suppression of the feminine.

And I vowed to bow to that f***ing broken heart as if it were God Herself.

Until the end of time.

- Jeff Foster

29/07/2022

Repost from

This came up in my on-this-day archive and it’s too good of a quote not to share again! Animals freeze all the time to protect themselves from predators. There is no shame in freezing. It was a way for your body to protect and defend itself.

[Image description: Green background with a picture of a tiger and a quote from Peter Levine that reads, “Animals do not view freezing as a sign of inadequacy or weakness, nor shall we.”]
-

28/07/2022

After three months with my beautiful love in Palo Alto I am heading off to Berlin today for a short time, in order to get a few things done, that cannot wait any longer.
I hate to leave.
But I look forward to be back very soon, and we will continue writing our book together.
It will be a very special and very precious book.
Stay tuned.
He took this photo 10 minutes before I left.
❤️❤️❤️

Timeline photos 15/07/2022

Timeline photos

"It is not happiness that makes us grateful. It's gratefulness that makes us happy." -Br. David Steindl-Rast

📷: Doug Menuez

WORD FOR THE DAY - https://bit.ly/wordfortheday

14/07/2022

Your anger, doubts, sorrows and fears are not 'wrong' or 'bad' or 'unevolved'. They are not ‘low vibrational’ or ‘negative’ or ‘unspiritual’. Those words are all labels and judgements of the mind. The Heart knows no such labels or judgements. These ‘negative’ feelings are only lost and lonely energies in us longing for warmth, acceptance, empathy, oxygen... and curious attention.

Fear is not the opposite of love, just as no wave is the opposite of the ocean. Fear is a complete expression of consciousness, the same ocean-consciousness that dances as bliss and joy and wonder too. Fear is a contracted, tense, dense and held-in form of love, but not its opposite.

This non-dual understanding will change your life. And begin to end all inner opposition and violence.

You do not 'attract' abuse, loss or misfortune through a faulty 'vibrational frequency'. You did not ‘manifest’ your cancer or infection or fracture through your desires. These are old guilt-ridden, victim-shaming - and frankly narcissistic - stories based on a dualistic understanding.

We need these New Age myths and lies no longer. Let us turn to face reality instead, and welcome all feelings, even the ‘darkest’ ones, as our beloved inner children, waves of the Heart, astonishing expressions of the Divine.

- Jeff Foster

08/07/2022

Writing time.
I am sitting in my favourite place of writing.
Having a few hours to work on our book is such wonderful feeling.
I am enjoying this process, where words are coming, thoughts and memories are arising and starting their dance on the pages.
In this moment I am totally content and fulfilled.
Happy weekend❤️💙

Photos from Joy of Living's post 05/07/2022

I have rarely if ever seen such incredible cloud formations.
A wonderful afternoon at Stanford university campus.

Photos from Joy of Living's post 03/07/2022

Another Californian treasure: The Filoli gardens and mansion.
So beautiful.
Living in a house like that with the comfort of today. Ahhhhhh.

Photos from Joy of Living's post 29/06/2022

Writing a book is a wonderful and sometimes very tedious business.
Today I needed something else to clear my mind.
We went to the cactus garden at Stanford again, and it always is such joy to find still a few beautiful flowers blossoming.
I also found sunglasses on a bench, just made for me.
Tonight I am cooking a new dish as a surprise.
Recharging my batteries my way🥰

Photos from Joy of Living's post 21/06/2022

A super hot day - 39C -.
I was looking at this wonderful mapletree, thinking that sometimes a little help can increase beauty.
That's what we do in therapy.
Helping the beauty to shine in it's prime.

07/06/2022

HOW TO LOVE

When a loved one is in physical or emotional pain,
when their world no longer makes sense,
your simple listening can work wonders.

Cry with them.
Be silent with them.
Validate their feelings, however painful.
Help them feel known in this world.

Don't offer clever answers now. Offer yourself.
Don't preach and teach.
Don't judge them, or make them feel wrong for thinking their thoughts.
Embrace them.
So they do not feel alone.
So they can touch upon their own courage.
Their capacity to withstand intense feelings.

When a friend is in physical or emotional pain,
when their world no longer makes sense,
offer them the greatest medicine of all:
Your love.

- Jeff Foster

Photos from Joy of Living's post 30/05/2022

A wonderful day in San Francisco with a dear new friend.❤️

28/05/2022

One month today in this beautiful place with my wonderful companion.
I feel deeply grateful for everything we are experiencing.
The process of writing a book together is taking me and us into places I have not dared to visit before.
I never felt enough confidence and trust to face them.
Now, with him, I feel safe enough to encounter all of them.
What a blessing it is to be in the presence of love and trust inside myself.
My heart is full, and my mind is surrendering❤️

Photos from Joy of Living's post 27/05/2022

In writing our book we often encounter challenging parts in ourselves.
We take breaks in nature and culture to recharge and get some perspective again.

26/05/2022

I am in the middle of a life changing process again.
When I look at my life, I have gone through many of them, starting at the age of 18, when I decided to study psychology, leave my family,
which was something no one in my family had ever done, not to speak of the community.
People didn't even know the word.
Consequently, I grew away from my tribe.
I never regretted it, it saved my life.
Many times after that I took life changing decisions.
All of them were accompanied by fear, anxiety, nightmares, but all of them resulted in me ending up better than I was before.
How was I able to do these big jumps?
I think part of it is that I have a lot of courage, and when my heart is calling, I trust it and follow through.
Not easy, but always, with no exception, leading to the better.
I have made it my purpose to encourage others to live the life they truly desire, despite obstacles, trauma, fears.
Never give up!
Trust your heart!
Dare healing!
Dare to live!

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Our Story

I have created this page to support people to live a meaningful, fulfilled life.
After many years of experiencing many ups and downs myself and also seeing this in the lives of others, I can say this: tIn my understanding the purpose of life is to live fully, with all your heart, all your talents, dedicated, joyful and ecstatic!
I have had many teachers, and those who I learned from the most were those who lived - and some of them still are here - a dedicated, uncompromising life.
This is what I teach: Don't compromise, never give up, every day is a new beginning!
Trust in life, it gives you exactly what you need to experience right now, in order to grow into who you truly are.

I am here to support you, encourage you, uplift you, share my experiences with you, and that is my purpose and greatest joy.

Lage

Adresse


EbersStr. 64
Berlin
10827
Andere Personal Coaching in Berlin (alles anzeigen)
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